Fixing Your Relationship:
If we are to look from the angle of why a recent relationship is not working out then we may need to watch out for some of the common factors that affects breakup in relationships, but then, it has gone beyond that as we have to look into our past relationship life to figure out where it all went wrong.
A question of why all relationships are not working for you is to deduce our conclusion from it premises. What I mean is that the question above clearly shows that it is not the present relationship that has not been working but every other previous relationships too has also failed to work.
Actually, it is natural to experience heart break sometimes; if you have once experienced it for any reason, then it means that the relationship was actually heading no where.
But the question that might come to anybody’s mind is, where am I getting it all wrong? Why is this happening and whose fault is it?
Why am I not Getting What I Desire?
The question of where you are getting it all wrong is proposed to be a one sided question because, all that comes to your mind at this moment is perhaps if you are the one who is not making things right in the relationship and is it a spiritual effect on you that you can not handle, nevertheless it might not be what you think.
This assertion is very dangerous when handling relationship issues, because you will always be at fault and may never get out of it, I will tell you how.
Making The Wrong Decision
Frustration in not getting a true relationship or true love may make us do things the wrong way in a relationship; it could make us to be submissive, loyal, trusting, and committed to the wrong partners.
When things are not working for you in a relationship, it might be that you mingled with the wrong sets of people or you are dating the wrong partner.
One thing to note is that when people get to notice our weaknesses and flaws they hold on to it and use them against us, this too we may never get out of especially when we get married to wrong partner.
Most especially for a lady who thinks that time is not on her side, such a lady is more vulnerable to getting into a relationship with the wrong partner and in no time the relationship eventually fails.
But when pointing from the angle of whose fault it is? This question isn’t directed to a singular person but sets of people in a relationship, it could be a question which comprises of our past and existing relationships.
Filtering Relationship Issues
Filtering an issue of this kind, on the question of why all your relationships are not working could either be from you or from your partner. It is normal to have misunderstandings and issues in a relationship but when it becomes too often and results to several breakups then, we must know the root of why our relationships fail.
“There are many reasons why lovers are afraid to connect at a deeper level. Insecurity can make them afraid that their partners will love them less if they know too much. Perhaps, when they’ve tried in the past, they have had bad experiences and felt rejection, abandonment, or invalidation” – psychologytoday
When trying to know why your relationship is not working, here are few questions you should ask yourselves.
How many people have I dated? What are the things that bring up issues? How do I handle issues? Who is always at fault? Who do I pass the blame on? Who do I confide in? And who made the break up and why did I leave?
These are questions of thoughts you should ask yourself when handling or to see reasons why all your relationships fails. Finding solutions to it could help shield your present relationship if you are in any, or help you when you get into one.
- Number Of Dates: The number of relationships we have engaged ourselves in could automatically determine where exactly the fault is actually coming from. Because moving from one relationship to another show that we may not be serious about the relationship we are into. But if that is not the case then let’s ask ourselves the next question, What Brings Up Issues?
- What Brings Up Issues: What are the things that brings up issues? Knowing the things that brings up issues or arguments in a relationship could help determine the reason why a relationship is not working. Are the things that brings up issues about money, time, communication, long distance or some other factors. If we can define or clarify what brings up issues in our relationships it becomes easier to fix them. Understanding and patience pays off in shielding a relationship, we must learn to understand our partners and also be patience, without this, there will always be issues.
- Handling Issues: How do you handle Issues? When there are issues or misunderstanding in a relationship how do you handle it? Do you shout or scream at your partner so that he or she may know that you also have the right to speak? Or you make them speak up their mind before interfering. Are you the type that feels reluctant to say please or say I am sorry? A man or a woman who does not respect his or her partner gives room to problem in a relationship and it may never be fixed until it eventually ends up in breakup.
- Who Is Always At Fault: Do you always feel or think your partner is always at fault, as you always find no fault in yourself, or you do not see yourself doing anything wrong for the period of time the relationship has being in existence. If this is so, then you are getting it all wrong because there is no human that will never make mistakes or do wrong, since we are imperfect as human we are bound to make errors and mistakes. So we should be opened to second thought, a person can never be wrong all the time, there must be some truth and right in what a man does, before you judge your spouse take your time to look deep into the situation before you conclude or make a final decision or action.
- Who Do You Shift Blames On: Shifting blames on our partner is a sign that shows that we are not really capable enough to take responsibilities and a man in a relationship that is not really ready to take blames can not take any other responsibilities effectively. This also applies to the women in relationships too because both the male and female has a great responsibilities to carry.
- Who Do You Confide In: Who do you tell about your relationship and what answers do you get? Is it the answer that favours you all the time or perhaps the answer didn’t favour you but you did things in your own way? Confiding in people who knows nothing about your relationship could harm your relationship because it is not everybody that we come across that loves us or wants to see us succeed especially when it comes to our relationships. It is not healthy to confide in just anybody. Confiding in people is dangerous but that doesn’t mean that we should not confide in people at all. When confiding in people make sure you are confiding in people who have good relationships or meet with a relationship counselor.
- Who Initiated The Break Up: Have you been the one initiating all the breakups? If so, ask yourself the reason why you end all of the relationships. Is it that you are tired of a recurring problem, and that exact problem kept on surfacing on every other relationship you have again had, if so, then you need to fix why your relationships are not working yourself by having a lot of patience and tolerance to understand your partner and the relationship in general.
Always remember “relationships are not meant to be perfect but balanced with good management from both partners”.
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3 thoughts on “Why Are All My Relationships Not Working?”
I swears i really needs u to more about this on my relationship
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