Spicing up Your Relationship In Marriage
“If marriage is fun, I rather play video game or go see a movie” – Tony one of our client spoke up. Frankly speaking, marriage should be something related to friendship, but this is not so. More reason why you need to spice up your relationship and give your marriage more attention.
Some people tried getting married to their best friends just to find ways to spice up their relationship, yet they find marriage to be frustrating, as there is absence of fun, happiness, and privacy in their union.
The ways to spice up a relationship isn’t meant for people who are in marriage alone, it is also for everyone who is planning to start courting, in courtship or those already prepared for marriage.
Though, it is believed that marriage is a good thing but many aren’t enjoying marriage. Most people thought marriage is a place of happiness, joy and love, some people have even planned how their homes would look like but now all seems like a dream to them.
These are what people pictured in their minds about marriage and before marriage, as many believed and have once dreamt on it now situation has taken a wrong turn on them as they find themselves in a dilemma, a puzzle they can’t find a clue to.
They have come to reality as they face a life time challenges they may not be able to opt out of, even though they have the choice.
Some even picture marriage as a means of slavery, where human wills are restricted as they do not have total control over their own freedom or right.
From Our conversation with people, so many people in relationship are sober, many people lament that they were not expecting such a rough and brutal life in marriage that if they had known this is how it would be, they would not have ventured into it in the first place.
“Before I got married I have this believe that I would marry a person to someone who will love me and cherish me like gold, value my personality and take good care of me like a child, we would be best friends and share things together but now I have come to my reality, I am facing my own problems and I wish I am just dream” – faith
But I tell you, these are natural experiences that we have to face in marriage and we have to face it with confidence, take it as a responsibility upon ourselves to change every negative situation, we have to believe and stay strong with a positive mindset towards success.
One of the problems attached to why relationships are not spiced up could be based on dominant control; at a point in marriage we would face dominant control. This is an act in which someone shows they are in charge of the relationship, like they are virtually in control. This is normal but we need to consider making some adjustment because it could ruin a marriage.
Ways To Spice Up Your Relationship
1. Doing The Same Old Stuff: One of the ways to spice up your relationship is to do the same old stuff you have been doing before you get married. Naturally, there are things that we do before marriage which our lover or spouses may love that could create more attention and attract them even closer to us. These things must not stop, we have to keep doing them so as to protect and shield our relationships from breakup.
Many marriages fail because they forget how they treat their spouses during courtship; that period of time when our feelings seem brand new, when the fire of love burns at the inception of our relationship.
A time when communication, respects, care, feelings, protection and responsibilities plays the front role. These are the things most people forget when they get married.
Attraction: One of the ways to spice up our relations;
Our mode of attraction must not stop, most especially when we get married. Most people see marriage as the final stage of love, but it is not because marriage stands as a life time relationship between lovers, the more we keep doing new things to impress our lovers the more attracted we be and the more attention our lovers give back to us.
“If you really want the best for your relationship, you must know how to spice up your relationship”.
How Do You Attract Your Spouses?
Marriage is just like our favorite pair of dress that we love so much which people admire on us when they see us on it. The more we wear the cloth, the more beautiful it seems to those who admire it right? But the more we wash and wear the cloth, the more it fades.
Gradually it fades away and has no more value in people’s eyes and in turn it could fade away completely and might wear off.
This also applies to us as an individual, when our lovers keep seeing old stuffs, they get bored and irritated. To attract our lovers or spouses with the new things is one of the good ways to spice up your relationship and create more attention in marriage.
How do we spice up relationship by attraction?
Spicing up our relationship by attracting our lovers involves doing some old stuff we do back then in courtship and before marriage. What is it that we do before marriage that we do not do again?
Mode of dressing: When most of us get into marriage we tend to get loosed instead of buckling up to keep attracting our spouses the more, this could happen to either the husband or the wife in marriages.
We may have over looked our mode of dressing as something not important since we are always and fully with our husband, or because we are too busy with work or other things in the home but still our mode of dressing speaks a lot and it’s very important because this is a great way to spice up your relationship as it creates more impression.
Back then in courtship, our dressing mode commands a lot of things, such as respect, love and it creates more impression on our spouses. This even goes as far as communicating a language other people may not understand but our lover.
You understand what I mean!
Men are easily attracted to what they see than what they hear. Many women dress loose in marriage because they feel it is not necessary, while men seem to be attracted to what they see.
Dress sexy when necessary, and when your spouses do not expect, dress smarter even though you have over four kids, let him know you are still on point.
Most single and young ladies out there impress many married men just because of their mode of dressing, married men easily fall victim of this, if we do not look into this as soon as possible we might end up losing our marriage.
Be clean and be smart in dressing, do some makeup; our dressing and look will force our husband to ask us if we are going out. The moment he notices you and he ask this, then you have gained is attention for that moment. These are ways to spice up your relationship and keep your marriage alive.
2. Surprise: never stop surprising your spouses; this is another way to spice up your relationship. Keep doing new things in the home as a form of surprise. People love surprises especially women, even life itself is full of surprises. So why not keep surprising your spouses. A man should always find all means to surprise his wife, to ignite the fire in the marriage.
Marriage could be boring at some point, because it involves two different people from different backgrounds and that is why courtship comes before marriage, courtship is a time and stage in a relationship when two lovers get to know more about themselves such as their attitudes and characters, likes and dislikes.
Courtship is a period when we can build our mindsets to what matters in a relationship, a time where we get to understand our lover better and the best time to know what our lovers wants are. These might help in some ways to spice up your relationship before and in marriage.
